Wikipedia:Unusual ways to get your article on Wikipedia

This is a humorous essay.

It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Wikipedia contributors and is made to be humorous. This page is not one of Wikipedia's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints. This essay isn't meant to be taken seriously.

People are always trying to create articles about themselves on Wikipedia, but these articles are usually deleted almost immediately, since the subject in question does not meet Wikipedia's standards of encyclopedic notability. Here is a list of unusual ways you could potentially acquire significant enough coverage in secondary sources to make yourself notable enough to warrant an article on Wikipedia:

Climb the Reichstag (Spiderman costume optional)
Declare yourself emperor of the United States.
Trick the foremost doctors in your region into thinking you have given birth to rabbits.
Keep a five-million-word diary with encoded sections describing your sex life in great detail and hope it becomes a valuable historical source centuries later.
Become a Hugo Award finalist for writing gay dinosaur smut.
Read the entire fifteenth edition of the Encyclopædia Britannica and write a book about it.
Re-found the Skoptsy movement.
Become a missing person.
Attempt to purge the English language of all vocabulary of non-Germanic derivation.
Attempt to sue a rapper for lifting your twenty-year-old tracker file.
Attempt to sue Satan.
Follow news teams around trying to be particularly rhythmic and hope Songify the News is watching.
Make an ass of yourself on YouTube repeatedly.
Write a work so scandalous that it gets banned in Boston.
Succeed in being the only person not to make an ass of yourself on YouTube.
Make a campaign promise and actually keep it.
Become an immortal god.
Paint with a body part nobody expected.
Jump into a volcano to make people think you've become an immortal god.
Create art from (literal) shit you found at home.
Create a hit claymation series for children about a man with an inordinately long, prehensile penis.
Create your own website solely devoted to attacking Wikipedia.
Write yet another book to "prove" there could not have been a single gunman.
Cause a major controversy on Wikipedia itself.
Be nominated for an Ig Nobel Prize.
Be nominated for a Darwin Award.
Get a sewage treatment plant named after you.
Become a Heroic Failure.
Create a law and make the penalty death. Then break your own law and commit suicide to uphold it.
Get someone to create an article and then sue the Wikimedia Foundation over how it shouldn't be there.
Die and be believed to return as a vampire, leading your neighbors to exhume, stake, and burn your corpse.
As an actor, mispronounce one of your lines in a humorous way so that comic playwrights make fun of you and people will remember your mistake over 2,400 years later.
Attempt to be forgotten.
Undertake a practical joke that leads to questions being asked in your respective national parliament.
Break the world record for the most sockpuppets on Wikipedia.
Break the world record for the most vandalized pages by one account on Wikipedia.
Become a successful evil overlord by following the Evil Overlord List.
Nominate the deletion debate on the deletion debate on the deletion debate on the deletion debate on... your troll group for deletion.
Lead a campaign for your region's secession.
Lead a campaign to prevent secession, even if nobody is trying to secede.
Impersonate an embassy of Abyssinian royals and trick the Royal Navy into showing you their flagship.
Find the Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Get Justice Thomas to say something in oral arguments.
Burn down one of the Seven Wonders of the World just so you'll be remembered.
Recursion: See: 45
Write the definitive guide to identifying weather balloons.
Create a killer joke.
Start rapping 6/7ths of the way through a beat.
Become an admin, put false information on your user page, let slip a few hints that it's false, wait for the media to cover it.
Make a successful career in underwater basket weaving, then donate all your proceeds to fund scholarships for students to major in it.
Get your cat elected mayor of your hometown.
Discover a centuries-old war that never formally ended and end it.
Get a bunch of Sherpas killed on Everest, but make sure your chihuahua makes it back safe.
Rediscover the process of rediscovery.
Literally re-invent the wheel... and then get a patent.
Prove using financial theory that what goes up must come down rapidly...
Make a cup of tea for every person in Belgium.
Become a Dancing Pallbearer and go viral.
As a famous composer, write a song about anilingus.
Create a longer version of the Iliad by adding one line of your own after every two lines of the original.
Write Unreal for NES.
Launch your car into space.
Steal the Mona Lisa.
Steal a small country.
Steal first base, and then get a home run on your first try against a MLB guest team.
Determine the exact production process for Damascus steel.
Reform RfA on Wikipedia.
Attempt to arrest Tony Blair for war crimes.
Use your lottery winnings to buy more lottery tickets.
Decipher the Voynich manuscript.
Identify the sixty-four locations of hidden treasure described in the Copper Scroll.
Present a copy (and translation) of the Necronomicon to the Smithsonian or Bodleian
Successfully forge a document of similar note.
Become a successful transgender French secret agent.
Take the Trump administration down from the inside.
Produce the first net gain fusion reactor.
Develop a spell checker that can detect British sarcasm.
Cure British sarcasm.
Cure being British.
Coach the Scotland national football team to a World Cup win.
Be the second Scot to win Wimbledon.
Lead Scotland to freeeeeedomm!
Find Jimmy Hoffa's remains.
Take the first human image of the Lacus at ground level.
Build a robot and get Saudi Arabia to grant it legal citizenship.
Find a cure for the common cold...
...then give it away under an open-access model.
Uncover the true monarch of England.
Create clickbait for a living.
Become the first psychohistorian.
Lobby the International Astronomical Union to name the first inhabitable extra-solar planet Trantor.
Launch the first manned space mission funded by Kickstarter.
Create a usable UI for GNU/Linux.
Create a new programming language based on Esperanto.
Prove P = NP for all cases.
Legally redefine pi as exactly three.
Predict the end of the world. (Preferably by planetary collision, but, really, any way will work.)
Start a band that only uses vegetables for instruments.
Claim that you have a magic golden thigh.
Die and get Jesus to resurrect you from the dead.
Kill Jesus and resurrect him from the dead.
Claim that you are Jesus.
Claim that you are Jesus's younger brother, found your own Heavenly Kingdom, and set off the deadliest civil war in human history.
Become a porn star.
Write the worst fan fiction ever.
Create a video game with amazing Engrish.
Be part of a hazing ritual involving intimate contact with another species.
Have the president's attorney hold a historic press conference at your small landscaping business.
Be sufficiently recognized in your field of expertise (however obscure) that an entire species is named after you.
Simulate life on Mars.
Pretend to be the ambassador of India in your country, convince local authorities you are, and get a comedy film made about it.
Create over 200 hoaxes on medieval Russian history on Wikipedia.
Eliminate a CEO.
Create Wikipedia.
Create a better Wikipedia, then claim you made it first and sue Wikipedia for copyright infringement.
Get your article published as a humorous essay so it doesn't need 99 sources.
Promote this list to "Featured List" status.

DISCLAIMER: Some of the ideas on this list may be illegal in your jurisdiction. This is only a list of possibilities, not recommendations. The Wikimedia Foundation and the editors involved in the creation of this list are not in any way morally or legally responsible for any bodily harm, damage of property, imprisonment, global catastrophes, or other negative outcomes that may result from attempting any of the ideas on this list. This list makes no guarantees or certifications. Readers who attempt any of the ideas on this list may not necessarily receive an article on Wikipedia. Contact your doctor if you experience an erection lasting more than four hours.

See also